Random Thoughts
Sunday, October 21, 2012,2:47 PM
Personal Experinces
Today, I was out to hang out with a friend of mine, and I met an American Guy who has been in Egypt during the revolution, he was there in the square and the major events after it.

I rarely talk about what it was like to be there, as a doctor or as a citizen, it is something just too personal for me to share, when people ask me I just reply their questions, they can’t understand, how it was like to be there, how ready each one there was ready to give up everything, for the idea or even the dream of a better country, for the normal people it is just an amazing thing, A really good amazing point in History where people take actions.
It was not that, it was THE moment when I felt really Egyptian, THE moment where you start building your country in your head as the best place in the world despite all the limitations and the problems it has right now, it was THE moment when all those patriotic songs just made sense, it was THE moment where you can trust anyone else beside you because he is just Egyptian and THE moment you care for your opponents and just wish they understand you more and you are more keen that they come to your side and join your dream than to actually beat them and be victories, it was THAT moment and much much more, it is still just too personal to share honestly.

Today I was blabbing with this guy, I honestly don’t remember his name, but it was such easy to talk with him, I realized how much I missed talking about it, it is much easier to talk to people when you know your personal experiences will fall into context with them, maybe that is why all the support groups just work.

I don’t know if I was bragging, disclosing or just the need to relive those moments with a fellow who has been through the same, But I really felt like talking and I really enjoyed it.
 
posted by Someone Different
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Wednesday, October 17, 2012,10:33 AM
Reflections
It has been somehow a strange week.
Things are getting weird in some aspects, overloaded in others and promising in others.

It is really strange how our prospective of life around us, and how we interpret the same events, in totally different ways maybe even opposites.

When you are happy you see the world through those bright, colorful glasses, everyone around you is smiling, and in just a few moments when your mood changes, those glasses dims, and the colors vanish, everyone around you is gloomy, you seem to shutdown and the whole world follows you.

Nothing around us is definitive, there are just so few certainties in our daily lives.

I have some work to do today, But as usual I am not doing any, it is accumulating and accumulating, I should be really doing it.

Our own Fears are our greatest barriers, they just hold us back, they make us miss on the experience we chicken out on, either it is the fear of getting hurt, the fear of disclosing and opening up or the fear of being misunderstood and above all the fear of not knowing what we really know, the moment we learn how to conquer those fears, or at least ignore them, that we really start experiencing life, yes of course we most probably we will get hurt, we will be misunderstood, and we might never know what we really want, but It most of the times will be worth it, the experience, the joy and Ride of it will outweighs the consequence if not at least compensate it.
 
posted by Someone Different
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Wednesday, October 10, 2012,12:34 PM
Random Thoughts
So it has been ages since I was here.
Now I am not an intern anymore
I am doing my masters in Lebanon, at the American University of Beirut (AUB).

Here it is a whole other thing, I am attending classes, still facing trouble with studying but at least I am attending.

The University is a lot different than my home university, lots of green spaces, the teaching, the curriculum.
And the the students are a whole other thing, some are just plain silly, and others are more interesting, it is bad when you are good at reading people, it usually takes the joy out meeting those bad people till you know they are bad.

Now I am much older than the last time I was here, your age is not just measured in years and days, it is mainly measured in your life experience, I was there during the Revolution, I left my beloved organization, and got through that agonizing feeling of having nothing to do for long periods of time, I worked with the United Nation (UN).

Did this all change me, I really don't know I would say yes, although I don't feel it.

Why I am even Writing now I don't know, but this is just a start, I guess I will be here more often.

Wish me good luck.
 
posted by Someone Different
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Friday, August 27, 2010,9:51 AM
Long Time Ago
It has been a while since i wrote something here, I even forgot how to login and took sometime to remember my username and password.

These days I am facing Loneliness, and a huge urge to write, say what I Feel.

The worst kind of loneliness is when you are surrounded by people, but you still feel alone, when you have many friends, but nothing to do, when you have time, efforts and will but no target to utilize all those things in.

In the past 2 years I was finishing my 2 last years of exams of collage, and they passed :), strange as it may sound they passed, and as i always say, I am a living example of how our examination system and education paradox is totality Fucked up.

I made some advancements in the organisations I am volunteering in I was elected the president 2 times, finished some major problems and I think I am still doing a good job.

Enough of the past, I hope in the coming days I will focus on the present.

I am an Intern in Zagazig University Hospitals, and if you don't know what does that means, Wait for my next post.
 
posted by Someone Different
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Saturday, April 12, 2008,4:07 AM
A Post Too Good To be Forgotten
Read this post and the attached articles,

Forget the message itself, see through the meanings, The meanings of her actions, She wasn't forced to do anything, but because she wanted to something, The Power Of Believing In Something,

I have never heard anything about her before, but i really regret it.

Read the Story >>Here<<


 
posted by Someone Different
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Wednesday, April 9, 2008,12:25 PM
My Freedom and Their Authority

Nowadays I am living the problem of most our generation, I want more freedom, and my parents don't think I deserve it.

Before I proceed lets review some facts:

I am 22 years old (next august ISA).

I am a fifth medical student.

I am Taller than my father and mother (180 cm). I am just drawing you a picture.

Now back to the main subject, I see that I deserve my freedom, I am not a kid anymore, my collages in school are working in their jobs now, one of them actually is waiting his FIRST BABY in a few months, I have no hand in being in a long school, I have no hand in being in a community that the only way for a man to leave his father's house except to his own with his wife.

My parents in the same time think that I am not up to it, that I am misusing this freedom.

I have a few words that I must get out or something is going to happen to me, and in the same time I can't get it out to them, so here it comes.

Freedom : I think it is the one's ability to choose, as long as he is not harming or affecting anyone else he is FREE to do what he want, If he is breaking some Devinne rules god is responsible to punish him in this life or in the after life, as long he is not trying to do harm to any one else, even though his choices are harming himself, and I am saying EVEN IF, no sane person will ever choose something that he knows it will hurt him, unless the gain he is going to receive is more than that harm.

Lets go back to their standard replies, " You are living in my house, until you find a house of your own or another one make as u want " , I am not living in your house because you are making charity on me , I am living in your house because you lived in your fathers house, I am living in your house because it is part of your responsibility towards me, as it is a responsibility on me to respect you and honor you, it is not because you bay me or because I live in your house, why then people ask their children to respect them and honor them after they are married, they are not living in their houses anymore, they are not forced to do it, they do it because they want to, it is part of their respect to their selves if they are will raised to respect their parents, not because they are paying me to.

Another reply, " You don't know the good way to your self, you are destroying yourself ", Where is my freedom if all my choices are monitored and can be reversed without my will, may be it is not the good road in your eyes but what about mine?? may be I see another thing, may be I don't Scale with the same standards, either social or economic or even religious.

Another Thing, "You are still a student, your work now is to study when you finish do what you want", OK so the only barrier is that I am a student, so if I choose to end that barrier right now the problem will be over, but hey wait a minute, you don't have the right to end that barrier because you are still young, you don't know the sound route, and if you tried to overcome that barrier by working while you are still a student, for them it is just a kids play, it is not real working, because you are still a student, can any one solve this dilemma?

"You still need to be raised, we failed in raising you", OMG, really Oh My God, I am a 22 years old person, if you didn't raise me well in the past 20 years, are you going to fix it now?, how come you want to change me now, you have worked hard in the past years in raising me , the time has come to stand back , give me my space, and hope for the best, it is the time to see the result of your work, the exam is now being marked, can you say please I want to change my answers now? Can you?. You must hold back and wait to the see your results because the time of solving the exam up.

"You were good before, what happened to you", it is the same old me, just because I am asking for my privacy, and asking for my right to choose, I am suddenly all gone bad???

Every one of our parents want us to be the first on his grade, and the most athlete in the club, and the smartest and most genius in the world, the most handsome/beautiful among his/her group, the most one to relay on, the best one to stand in the hard times, the leader of the world and the kindest towards the week.

Have anyone told them that we all bear the name SUPERMAN?, I can't be all that, why cant u settle down to most of these characters, why can't you accept me as I am, may be I am not the fastest but may be I am the smartest, why you keep looking on the fast character, if you just diverted your vision a little to the right you will find that there is a character or more that you like and I am good at.

Give me my Space, Accept me as I am, as long as I am respecting you, and doing some good, please stop pushing me, one day I won't stand the pressure anymore, you sound upbringings are holding well till now, but every thing has a limit, may be that limit won't come, and I hope that too, but I can't grantee it, I am not threatening , and I wont ever do, but I had to get these thoughts out, or they would have killed me.

 
posted by Someone Different
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Friday, March 7, 2008,3:55 PM
We Were Great Once
I am not the kind you take as an obvious religious person - i am not saying this because i am proud of it or because I like it but this is how I at least see myself -, So this topic is not from a view of one of those nice people who are sure of themselves, it is from an average person.

Today when I wake up - at 12.20 am - my mother was watching the TV, and my computer was not free so i said why don't I share her, and on the screen was a movie I have seen a lot before Al-Ressalah or The Message, and the wonderful movie took me, then a scene came up, The one of Badr battle, the one where Saidona Hamza was standing along with Saidona Ali and Saidona Obaida - Radia Allah 3anhom game3an - to meet 3 of the strongest warriors of their enemies by then.

I Don't know why, but I felt like crying, those were our ancestors, those are - and deserve to be - our role models, we were strong once before, we were as Muslims filled with believe to stand in front of the wrong and say no, even though we were much less in numbers and much less in equipments, but we were much more in belief, we had an inner strength enough to shake the mountains itself.

We were much more more great once before, we were worthy of the name a Muslim, there was a time when it is enough pride to you to hold your head high and say " I am A Muslim " and that is not because you have the power or the money or the authority, but because you had the belief, and because you belonged to something bigger, you had a bigger purpose in life than to live your life, you had a life time target, an endless group life time target.

And I am not talking about the time when Islam was a great empire that extended among the horizon of the globe, i am not talking about the time when the whole system was Islamic, I am talking about the time when Muslims were a minority, when they were kicked outside their homes, living abroad, when they were weak in all eyes except theirs because no one else saw the strength of their believe.

They deserved to be called Muslims, they suffered a lot not to be mentioned in history books, not to the glory, but because they believed.

Now we are all called Muslims, but do we deserve to be called this, we are now humiliated all around the world not because the world is a bad place waiting to eat us, but because we went bad, we went weak, we - or most of us - lost the source of their inner strength, we are in a real world, you are what you make of yourself, you are not what your ancestors were, you are living today, What Are You??

And Since it all started with the movie I will Quote the comment written on IMDB by an user there on the movie page.
most amazing experience, 10 October 2004
Author: marialette from Northumberland

I saw this film when I was working and living in Brussels in 1979. Most of my friends were North African, ergo Muslim. When this film came out, we all went to the Bourse Cinema. The film itself was very enlightening, and the fact that Mohammed himself was never 'in the picture' (so to speak) I found contributing to the profoundness of the film. What really struck me was that when in the film religious (holy) verses (like psalms) were sung or played, the whole audience would reverently sing along. Very moving.

Of course, it was 25 years ago, and I cannot remember a lot of it, but it was my first encounter with Islam and made a major impact.

This is just a small sign for those who thinks that the outside world is all waiting to eat us alive, people see you as you show yourself to them.

I wrote the first Sentence in this topic for a reason, I am not that good, I am not the perfect one nor by any means near to it, it is just a surge of thoughts i had and i felt like writing down.

I am really sorry but I ask you not to comment on this subject, these are personal feelings, very personal in my case, so please forgive me for asking.
 
posted by Someone Different
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